Monday 21 May 2012

Holding steady...

5 weeks into my injury.

5 weeks of no running.

4 weeks of maintenance and some over indulging.

I haven't been writing much because I'm not too sure what I should report.

There is a big part of me that feels like a gigantic failure for going into maintenance.  I have given up on reaching 199 by my birthday because I found I was stressing about it TOO much and was having all these anxious obsessive thoughts about it.

I feel weak for admitting that I needed wanted a mental break.

I also had a bunch of stuff go on in a short amount of time which proved one thing.  I'm not cured.  I used food to comfort myself.  My husband changed jobs, I got injured, I've been sick and sick again, laryngitis and then gastroenteritis, and my plantar fasciitis is acting up a lot.  Guess what?  Its really just a whole bunch of excuses, and I accepted them.

Regardless of all that, I still feel strong.  I know I'm not done, and  I KNOW I will be back on track shortly.  I am 100% confident that I will not backslide, and that I will be back to making progress in the very near future.

I'm not completely off-track either, just not making any progress and enjoying not restricting myself!




3 comments:

  1. Danielle aka PixiesX321 May 2012 at 19:44

    Ya know what, Megan? I don't know that we are ever "cured". It's a process but I don't think the final product is really final either! Although the close we get to our healthier selves, the easier I envision it to be to stay there.

    Sometimes "it is what it is". So, for now, keep working on what you can.

    You can't run... so do what you can do.

    You put yourself on maintenance... try eating to live not living to eat. (Ugh I hate that but am trying to live it!)

    You keep reporting here, girl! Good, bad, ugly! This is a project and it is on-going! :P So there!

    YOU STILL ROCK in my book! :) :) :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with eating to live instead of living to eat. I've been trying to actually use MFP less because I keep looking and thinking "I have ___ calories I can still eat today" instead of listening to my body. I just don't want to give up my days logged :P

      I'm hoping I can look can at this soon and feel wonderful about how I conquered and overcame this obstacle!

      Delete
  2. I am new to your blog, but it sounds like you have had a run of bad luck. I am happy and inspired to hear you are moving forward and not going to let all of this stuff keep you down!! BTW, I just followed.

    ReplyDelete

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